The Great Shadowlands Preparation Bible of Get Shanked Snakeface

The Great Shadowlands Preparation Bible of Getting Shanked Snakeface also known as "TGSPBoGSS" or "The Bible 2.0" is the guide to preparing for the new expansion Shadowlands, and has been in development since the end of Mists of Pandaria. Unlike other guides this focuses only on the first 24 hours as those hours decide if you have a future in the expansion or if you should flush your physical copy down the toilet so it gets plugged and your mom yells at you.

Real life prep

* Tesco Cola (or other cheap Cola like Freeway Cola) - It's not worth using the expensive brands like Coca Cola or Pepsi because you actually get 0.06% less energy per bottle but also they cost more. Getting the cheap stuff means you can afford more bottles which means you will stay up longer.

* Sleep for 8-10 hours before midnight, if possible you can go into hibernation for a week or month before so you come out pumped and rested.

* Food - A common mistake is to get chips, other snacks or chocolate. The issue is your fingers get grimy (like a black person) and you gotta wipe them off all the time. This wastes time and is annoying. We recommend getting Baby food, especially the chicken one that tastes like KFC. It's easily digestible and you wont get grimy fingers.

Computer prep

* Uninstall all other programs and do a fresh wipe of your drive. Don't want any other programs distracting or taking up memory.

* If you launch Shadowlands from a floppy disk you are able to save time clicking the program in your PC

* Lowest graphic settings and we also recommend removing all addons because you will save load times * Get the mod "8 bit WoW" it will make ur game look like it came from 1993 but you get much faster load times and you will be level 52 before others get through the loading screen.

In game prep

* 13 anchors - there's a few lakes and rivers and you might want to get to the bottom quickly

* 21 Speed potions - any potion that will help u for a level before becoming useless is good

* If u play a slow class such as DK or Paladin just reroll. Waste of time, and play something like a poopy (but fast) monk or best class in the world DH instead

* Herbalism - so u can pick up grass

* Log out at 31.68 in Feralas since the first quest in Shadowlands starts there

* The song "Run, N*gger, Run" by Uncle Dave Macon on repeat is proven to make your brain work at 110% capacity and will make leveling faster